"The Princess and the Frog" - Disney's return to traditional animation... and Disney Princesses

The Princess and the Frog is Disney's newest Disney Princess film. As a kid, when Tiana (Elizabeth Dampier) heard the story of the princess and the frog, she was uninterested in meeting a prince, and even less interested in kissing a frog. Her dream is to own a restaurant, which she shares with her father James (Terrence Howard). When she grows up (and is now voiced by Anika Noni Rose), her father is dead, and she works as a waitress in New Orleans, trying to save up enough money to purchase a building to make into a restaurant; however, she seems to not have any time or desire for fun. She eventually comes up with the money... or so it would seem. She's been outbid and has a limited time to come up with the remaining money or she'll lose the property. Meanwhile, Prince Naveen (Bruno Campos) has recently made his way into town. Naveen mooched off of his rich parents and didn't do a thing for himself, thus he was abandoned. His plan is to marry a princess and live off of her. However, he is turned into a frog by the voodoo priest Doctor "Shadow-Man" Facilier (Keith David), who prays on the weakness of others to get what he wants. Naveen's butler, Lawrence (Peter Bartlett), who is fed up with Naveen, meets Facilier and is turned into the prince as part of a plan concocted by Facilier. However, rich Charlotte "Lottie" La Bouff (Jennifer Cody) has fallen in love with Naveen and wants to marry him; Lawrence, disguised as Naveen, plans to marry her. On the flip side, the real Naveen sees Tiana in a princess costume, and asks for a kiss in exchange for the money to fund her dream restaurant... but since Tiana isn't really a princess, she is turned into a frog instead! A series of events sends them to the bayou, where they learn about Mama Odie (Jenifer Lewis), who may have the power to make the two human again, and they team up with Louis the alligator (Michael-Leon Wooley) who also wants to be human so he can play professional jazz, as well as Ray the firefly (Jim Cummings), who has fallen in love with a star he thinks is another firefly.

John Goodman voices Charlotte's father Eli "Big Daddy" La Bouff, and Oprah Winfrey voiced Tiana's mother Eudora.

Allow me to start off this review with a little history lesson. In 1937, Walt Disney Pictures created a legendary film... the first ever full-length animated film, and the first ever Disney Princess film... Snow White and the Seven Dwarves. (It's recently been re-released to DVD and Blu-Ray.) They continued with such features including Cinderella (1950) and Sleeping Beauty (1959). The 1990s was known to some as "The Disney Renaissance", including films such as The Little Mermaid (1989), Aladdin (1992), Pocahontas (1995), Mulan (1998), and the at-the-time highest grossing animated film (and still highest for traditional animation), The Lion King (1994). In early 2000, the term "Disney Princess" was coined, as a franchise that included (respectively) Snow White, Cinderella, Princess Aurora, Ariel, Jasmine, Pocahontas, and Mulan, and was largely used for merchandising opportunities. Looks like Disney's found another gold mine, huh?

... Well, not exactly.

In 1995, Pixar Animation Studios created the first ever feature-length computer animated film, Toy Story. Yeah, I don't need to explain, you've read all this before in my review for the double-feature. While many moviegoers saw this as a new advancement, others saw it as a downfall - soon, alongside Pixar, other companies started doing computer animated films as well. A notable example is DreamWorks, best known for the Shrek franchise, with their first picture Antz (1998), and I think they've only done two traditionally animated features (The Road to El Dorado and Spirit). Fox Animation Studios, known for 2-D films such as Anastasia (1997), closed down and merged with Blue Sky studios to do CGI films too, notably the Ice Age franchise as well as Robots (2005) and Horton Hears a Who! (2008) and the upcoming The Lorax (2012). Combine that was Sony Pictures Animation films such as Open Season (2006) and their most recent picture Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs (2009), and you've got yourself a new era. Eventually, Pixar's Finding Nemo (2003) overtook The Lion King as the highest grossing animated film, which itself was overtaken by DreamWorks' Shrek 2 (2004) which is now the fourth-highest grossing film domestically unadjusted for ticket inflation. Even this year, DreamWorks' Monsters vs. Aliens was the highest-grossing film of the spring and is still one of the top films of the year, Sony's Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs took the #1 spot for two consecutive weeks (Pixar's Up nearly did the same thing), and Blue Sky's Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs is now the third-highest grossing film on the foreign front as well as the third-highest grossing film domestically to have never hit #1. Monsters vs. Aliens, Up, and Ice Age 3 are living proof that 3-D is the new 2-D.

Eventually, Disney saw little profit in sticking to traditional 2-D animation, therefore they announced Home on the Range (2004) to be their last traditionally animated film (as if to prove their point, it bombed at the box office). So Disney decided to make their own independent CGI films such as Chicken Little (2005), Meet the Robinsons (2007), and Bolt (2008). Could this be the end of American-made theatrical 2-D animated films?

... For awhile, it seems so, but not anymore. The Princess and the Frog is Disney's return to traditional 2-D animation! Now that I've finished boring you with the history lesson, it's on to the actual review.

I had been waiting for this film for so long... and now it's finally here. The only other Disney Princess film I've ever seen on the big screen was Mulan. I had forgotten what 2-D animation looked like on the big screen (well, American animation, since I did see Ponyo earlier this year). What else is there to say? I loved everything about this film! The animation, the music, the characters, the slapstick gags... this is perfect! I know I'm changing my mind again, but this is my new favorite film of 2009, and with just three weeks left, this is gonna be hard to top! On top of it all, Tiana is a great example of a Disney Princess... the early Princesses were too reliant on their princes. Only Jasmine and Mulan seemed to be independent (well, not so much Jasmine... in a way, Aladdin did save her, but it's more figurative, and I just liked her attitude mostly) and strong role models... now we have a new one. Tiana's only drawbacks were that she is a workaholic who doesn't believe in fun, but it's understandable because that was how she was raised, and she was determined to see to it that her dream came true, and I won't spoil the rest for the two people who can't figure it out. Also, at one point during the film, she was sad when she saw what she thought was Naveen turned human again and actually believed that he had deserted her even though Mama Odie blatantly stated that when Naveen's curse was broken, Tiana's would be too, and she was still a frog (Ray even points that out shortly before that scene begins). It was also fun spotting references to other Disney films, such as Princess dolls on a shelf, but there were some references I think I made up, such as Louis saying "I couldn't figure out the topography... or the geography" or something like that, which immediately made me think of the Genie's line from Aladdin "I'm history! No wait, I'm mythology!" It's also worth noting that Tiana is the first black Disney princess, and the first African-American one. But don't worry - this film is not going to receive the Song of the South treatment.

The film got a G rating, however, there's some stuff to look out for, mainly violence. Most of it was just slapstick, but anyway: after Tiana is turned into a frog, she and Naveen float on balloons, which are popped on a tree branch and chased by cranes and alligators through the swamp. Louis gets hit with many thorns, which Ray pulls out of him. Shadow-Man has many creepy silhouettes that seem to be able to grab things and have him actually hold them. In a few scenes, the frogs say that "They're not covered in slime - it's actually mucous". Shadow-Man almost uses voodoo magic and sticks a pin in Lawrence/Naveen, but ultimately fails. In a flashback, Louis mentions he tried to play jazz for a band, but they shot at him. Guns are seen recurring throughout the film, usually in Louis' mind (at one point, we see what looks like silhouettes of men with guns, but it's really just musical instruments). Shadow-Man also mentions needing frog blood for something. Shadow-Man steps on Ray, but I won't reveal his outcome. As for sexual content... there's some subtle stuff. Charlotte's dress shows her cleavage, and she shoves tissues in it at one point and pulls on it when she mentions how beautiful she is. After Naveen asks Tiana for a kiss, she says, "Just one kiss?" Naveen says, "Well, if it leaves you hungry for more, then..." and licks his lips (we saw that in the trailer). Several bottles of champagne are present, and there's some name-calling such as "stick-in-the-mud".

Should you see it? Well, do you like Disney Princesses? Do you miss 2-D traditional animation? Do you like animated musicals? Are you a fan of any of the VAs (many of them have done Broadway shows, so you may recognize their singing voices) or composer Randy Newman? If the answer to any of those questions was "Yes", then by all means... SEE IT. You will not regret it.

"Everybody's Fine"... well, except David...

Everybody's Fine is a holiday remake on the 1990 Italian film of the same name. Frank Goode (Robert DeNiro) is an old widower who is usually visited by his four kids (David Goode, who is now an artist in New York, Rosie Goode [Kate Beckinsale] who works at an advertising company in Chicago, Robert Goode [Sam Rockwell] who is a musician in Denver, and Rosie Goode [Drew Barrymore] who is a dancer in Las Vegas) every year, but they all canceled on him. Therefore, he decides to pay a visit to each of them. The catch is that he has a condition where he can't fly in a plane, so he is forced to take buses, metros, trains, and even hitch a ride with a trucker. But what happens when David doesn't show up to answer the door, or reply to any of Frank's phone calls? And what's with the rest of his family? Why did they cancel? And what are they hiding?

Lucian Maisel also plays Amy's son Jack. Her husband Jeff is played by Damian Young.

At first, it just seemed like a typical Christmas movie, but it has its interesting twists. As usual, I prefer not to spoil them unless asked privately. I sort of guessed what happened to David, but not in detail. I actually didn't know that this was a remake until I saw it in the closing credits - I would like to check out the original. The David subplot is somewhat emotional, and it starts to reveal itself as the film goes along (you hear phone calls among the kids), but nonetheless, it ends as a feel-good Christmas movie.

The film got a good PG-13 rating, nothing really exaggerated and it could very well work as a family movie. I'm not sure what's prominent, I guess drug use since Frank must take prescription medication, and something else I won't talk about. There's also miscellaneous drinking and smoking, but it's nothing major. Robert attempts to smoke before Frank stops him (he says he made the mistake himself and quit). The only real violent act is Frank running into a man who is seemingly homeless, and he offers him some money, but then he tries to steal his wallet. They get into a brief fight, and while the other man doesn't make off with anything, he smashes Frank's vial of pills with his foot and runs off. Frank attempts to salvage what he can of it and takes the crumbs of the pills throughout the film. Upon his return home, Frank decides to take a plane, and right before a storm, he uses the bathroom. The plane starts to wobble and the pilot tells everyone to fasten their seatbelts, but Frank is on the toilet and appears to be about to vomit (clutching his stomach and covering his mouth), but he blacks out before we see what happened to him (he is later seen waking up from a hospital bed). The closest thing to sexual content in this film is a woman passing Frank and asking "Do you want to see my leg?" as she begins to lift her dress up (we don't see anything), but Frank responds with "Do you want to see mine?" and she walks off. Frank's fountain is a sculpture of a boy holding his penis (from which water comes out, but it doesn't look realistic). Don't worry about Rosie - we never see her do any explicit dancing. As Frank blacks out on the plane, he has a vision of his kids as kids in a picnic, but with their current adult mindset. Rosie says she's "not sure if she likes men or women", which could imply that she is bisexual. Frank also says a string of swear/religious words (something like "F**k s**t d**m Jesus Christ!") after failing to hit a golf ball further than Jack.

If you like Christmas movies, someone in the cast, or films about family bonding and separation, then this is the film for you. Stay tuned during the closing credits for two sets of photos: One set is photos Frank took on his trip, and the other appears to be some of the photos Frank took when his kids were young.

"Old Dogs" - all laughs and no plot but not a dull film

Old Dogs is a Disney family comedy staring Robin Williams and John Travolta as Dan and Charlie, respectively. Dan and Charlie are two co-workers who are best friends. In the year 2002, Dan met a woman named Vicki (Kelly Preston) and they were briefly married, but fast-forward to 2009 and Vicki shows up again to show Dan that they had two 7-year-old kids. Vicki is being sent to jail for chaining herself to a gate during a protest, leaving Dan to take care of the kids. He enlists the help of Charlie, but after unwittingly making a deal with Nishimura Corp. (the Japanese company they work for) that could get him promoted, he must make the decision to move to Tokyo or stay with the kids.

Seth Green also plays Ralph, a younger colleague of Charlie and Dan.

I'm sure you already know how it's going to end... but on the other hand, you probably don't exactly know how it's going to end, so I'll keep it secret. (All I'll say is you saw some of it in the trailer, but I won't say what part.) Anyway, the first part of the film practically has no plot and just seems like a flimsy excuse for a series of slapstick events to occur, but that doesn't mean it isn't funny. Seeing the poor reviews for this film as well as the fact that it failed to make it into the top 3 (which were older releases The Twilight Saga: New Moon, The Blind Side, and 2012) made me a little skeptical about it, but I enjoyed the film, if only because I don't think I've seen John Travolta or Robin Williams in a live-action comedy film in while (I know Robin Williams was in World's Greatest Dad but that didn't come to our area) where they weren't overdressed (so Robin Williams as Theodore Roosevelt in the Night at the Museum films and John Travolta as a woman in Hairspray don't count). I also was aware that this is Bernie Mac's actual final film (even though Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa and Soul Men from 2008 were advertised as such), but was disappointed when he didn't have a very large role, as well as lack of a tribute for him (it just says, "In Loving Memory of Bernie Mac and Jett Travolta" during the credits, whereas Soul Men had a picture of him that said goodbye to him on the final frame after the credits).

The film got a PG rating, and the most objectionable thing was entirely off-screen and not mentioned: Dan and Vicki had drunk sex during their vacation and had kids. Two workers (one played by Luis Guzman) mix up Charlie and Dan's pills, causing them (especially Dan) to be mixed up (and later everyone). Vicki wears a cleavage tops in a few scenes in the first half of the film, and Dan is seen in his underwear in the shower. Dan later struggles to answer his kids' question "Where do babies come from?". Charlie, Dan, and Ralph sneak into a zoo, and a gorilla tosses a tire at Charlie, knocking him out. The gorilla grabs Ralph and won't let him go, but Charlie and Dan run off into the penguin area, where the penguins attack them. Dan also kicks a ball at a child, which hits him in the face.

Well, if you just want to see a string of slapstick events, this is the film for you. Stay tuned during the closing credits for a funny little scene.

"The Blind Side" - I can't fully judge this due to my "Blind Side"

The Blind Side is a sports drama based on the novelized true story The Blind Side: Evolution of a Game by Michael Lewis. Michael Oher (Quinton Aaron) is an 18-year-old male who has been enrolled in many different high schools and his GPA is a 0.6 due to his failure to answer any questions on tests. He is practically homeless and resides in a broken foster home - he hasn't seen his mother in ages and his father passed away, and little else is known about him - many of his records have not been recovered. However, he has a knack for playing sports, especially football, and is somewhat more experienced in that area than any book/knowledge area. One day, Michael goes to a Christian school that takes him in, and he is greeted by a kid named S.J. Touhy (Jae Head), son of home designer Leigh Anne Touhy (Sandra Bullock) and restauranteer Sean Touhy (Tim McGraw). The Touhys take Michael in to live with him, and they tutor and take care of him until his grades improve enough for spring football... but as his grades improve, he is invited to several colleges. What will he choose, and how will it affect the Touhys? How will he excel in football? And who is really benefiting from this, Michael or Leigh? In a subplot, the Toughy's teen daughter Collins (Lily Collins) wishes to become a cheerleader.

So I first saw the trailer to this film before Shorts (personally, I think that's a strange choice of a film to put this trailer before, due to the vast difference in demographics) back in August. It looked pretty interesting, but cheesy. Later, after walking into a bookstore, I learned that Michael Oher actually made it into the NFL. That greatly aroused my curiosity. I eagerly waited for this film, and when I saw it, my expectations were met. This is personally my favorite film of the year (replacing Whip It as my #1, which, ironically, is also about sports). I literally cried during the first half, especially when we found out about his mother. I definitely want to read the book, but I recently heard the real Michael Oher did not like the film because he thought it was an insult to his skills prior to being taken in by the Touhys. I figured as much that it was an exaggeration for artistic purposes. As much as I enjoyed it, however, I feel it did have its flaws. For one, I'm not the biggest sports expert, and much of the last half of the film focused a bit more on football than the characters. My mind sorta just wandered when they went into detail about it, except for the parts about "Cover his blind side!" and "Protect them the way you would your family!" (using other terms for football). As well, they sort of glossed over Collins' subplot, making her role in the movie more minor than the average subplot or supporting character. Nonetheless, a great movie, and definitely one I would buy (I heard it is being considered for an Oscar, and I'd like to see it win one).

The film got a PG-13 rating, and as you'd expect from a sports film, you can expect football-related violence. Michael and S.J. also crash a car, with Michael having blood on his arm and S.J. being okay (turns out Michael took most of the blow). As his broken foster home, Michael attacls a thug, who points a gun at him, triggering a memory of his past (not sure if I should tell you about it, may spoil too much). As for sexuality, Leigh Anne wears some cleavage-bearing tops in some scenes, and is hit on indirectly by the thugs at Michael's foster home. The word "tit" is used twice, once in reference to a "titty bar" and the other as part of an instruction for blocking in football (Michael is told to put his hands "between [the other player's] tits"), and when Michael starts looking at college girls, Leigh Anne says that if he impregnates a girl, she will drive up there and cut off his penis. Much of the drug use is spoilers, but I'll talk about it privately.

If you're into sports movies, dramas, sports dramas, or Sandra Bullock, definitely check this out. It will wipe All About Steve right out of your head and will redeem Sandra Bullock if you are one of the many who despised that film. (Note that this is Sandra Bullock's biggest opening weekend, the previous one being The Proposal from earlier this year, and remained #2 at the box office behind The Twilight Saga: New Moon for two weeks in a row, with a rare increase in its second weekend while New Moon dropped 70%. There's a chance that this weekend it could actually top New Moon's weekend gross.) And stay tuned during the credits for a set of aftermath photos.

"The Twilight Saga: New Moon" - ...still no comment

The Twilight Saga: New Moon is the sequel to the original Twilight from 2008, also based on the book by Stephanie Meyer. The Cullens move away from Bella Swan (Kristin Stewart) because of fear of looking too young, and in turn, Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson) breaks up with her. Thus, her only shoulder to cry on his her childhood friend, Jacob Black (Taylor Lautner), whom we discover is really a werewolf. However, she still hallucinates about Edward, generally if she's about to do something that could kill her. Meanwhile, the Volturi want revenge on the Cullens, and they think that they should first go after the now-vulnerable Bella. Jacob summons some vampire allies to deal with the Volturi, but who will prevail? And will Bella ever get over Edward?

So I rewatched the original Twilight recently... I know I said before that I thought it was mediocre, but after watching it all in one sitting, I realized that it is a lot worse than I initially suspected. It basically is a 2-hour pilot episode where nothing happens, Kristin Stewart can't act, and does nothing but fawn over Edward who does all the work - a large example of anti-feminism (and I'm the one who watches/reads Sex and the City and the Shopaholic series) and quite possibly the greatest example of anti-feminism I've seen or heard of in a film besides Showgirls (which I will NEVER, EVER watch). Fortunately, that doesn't seem to be entirely the case with New Moon, which I did see all of in one sitting, but on the other hand, I'm not sure if that was the film talking or the fact that I first saw the film at something I felt like I earned... I really shouldn't discuss it in public, contact me privately for more info. Anyway, I was sitting with my friends in said screening and we were pretty much on rapid-fire, making fun of it, mostly during silent moments, which there were a lot of. (Though I think it was sort of unneeded when I heard a giggle when Bella said "I want to come!" and Edward said "I can't let you come!" Then again, so was my reference to "Who Let the Dogs Out?" by the Baha Men when Jessica was referring to Jacob as a dog and told Bella to let him out of her life.) I admit, I was intrigued by the trailer because it looked like there would be more action and fighting in this one, and there was, but not that much. I'll say there was more fighting elicited by the storyline, and more stuff did happen in it, but it's really not all that great. I'll give it this, though - there was less anti-feminism, but one reason is a spoiler. Nonetheless, her reaction and hallucinations when Edward leaves could be viewed as anti-feminism. I am still looking forward to The Twilight Saga: Eclipse coming June 30, 2010 (which they advertise during the closing credits), because I have heard as the series progresses, Bella becomes more independent, but still, I feel like I'm the only middle ground for this series... everyone else seems to either love it with great passion, or hate it with a burning passion.

The film got a PG-13 rating... same kind of violence as the first one had... Jacob as a werewolf and his werewolf clan fighting off the Volturi, Bella fakes suicide and does several risky activities such as a motorcycle that she falls off of (some of it has blood). Nothing really sexy, but Jacob and Edward are often seen shirtless. No big swears, and a few beers (and a goblet in a painting).

While I think it would make a good rental, especially if you have a RiffTrax or can make your own, my opinion probably means nothing - you're either going to see it or avoid it like the plague.

"The Box" - more complicated than its title

The Box is a thriller/horror film based on the 1970 short story Button, Button by Richard Matheson, notably redone as an episode of the 1985 series The Twilight Zone. It centers around Norma Lewis (Cameron Diaz, There's Something About Mary, The Mask, Being John Malkovich, What Happens in Vegas, My Sister's Keeper and the upcoming The Green Hornet) and her husband Arthur Lewis (James Marsden, X-Men films, Superman Returns, Hairspray, Enchanted, 27 Dresses), who live in Richmond, Virginia in 1976. Norma is a teacher, and Arthur works for NASA, but they pretty much live paycheck-to-paycheck, and Norma is worried about them losing their house. Then one day, a stranger named Arlington Steward (Frank Langella, Superman Returns, The Mask of Zorro, Masters of the Universe, Frost/Nixon) presents them with a button. Pressing the button will cause someone they don't know to die, but will reward them with one million dollars in cash so long as they don't tell anyone about this. Regardless of their choice, the button will be reprogrammed and the offer will be made to someone they don't know. Believing this to be a far fetched tale, they decide to press the button. They receive the money, but when they hear that someone was shot, Arthur does not trust Arlington and reports his license plate number to the police. Arlington then wreaks havoc on their lives via his "employees".

Sam Oz Stone also stars as Walter Lewis, the son of Norma and Arthur. Gillian Jacobs (Community) plays his babysitter Dana.

What I wrote is simply the basic premise of the story. The short story and the Twilight Zone episode derived from it did not have anything to do with "employees", or reporting of a license plate. In the original creations of this story, they press the button, get the money, and it ends with the button will be reprogrammed and sent to "someone else they don't know" and it ends with Norma and Arthur being paranoid that they will be next to die. The paranoia carries over into The Box, but this time they try to do something about it. The film is nearly 2 hours and 30 minutes long, directed by Kelly Richard, the director of Donnie Darko. Some say it is unnecessarily convoluted and takes a simple concept and blows it out of proportion, but I think the opposite. I think being convoluted in this case was necessary. In the original creations, they simply accepted the button with no questions asked. In The Box, when they received the button, Arlington mentioned that the deal is off if they report them to the police, which Arthur considered doing, and when he did later, Arlington made them pay for it. I also liked how it all came together in the end, and it wasn't predictable at all. I won't spoil that part, though.

The film scored a well-deserved PG-13 rating. Of course, the main factor is violence and scary stuff, of note being Arlington's face - half of his face has been so severely burnt you can see a portion of his teeth on one side. Norma also reveals that she dropped a barbell on her foot, and lost four of her toes. When Norma presses the button, the victim is seen on the news: we see a woman who was killed in a gunshot (a bit of blood) and her husband, and their daughter was locked in a bathroom. Several people Norma and Arthur come into contact with (not physical contact) have nosebleeds. Arthur is forced to choose three "pathways" (which seem to be him stepping into large rectangles of water), two of which will lead to eternal damnation (as will his refusal) and the other one will lead to freedom - he chooses right, but he appears over the bed in the water rectangle - the house is flooded. Norma and Arthur drive down the road to see a Santa Claus ringing a bell - they stop for him and are hit by a truck. Walter is locked in the bathroom, blind and deaf. Arlington offers Norma and Arthur one more chance - he says they can either leave things the way they are, or Arthur can shoot Norma in the heart (Norma wants to shoot herself, but Arlington says there are no negotiations), which will save Walter and the money they won will be transferred to a bank account to be available to him when he turns 18 (I won't tell you what they choose). There is heavy alcohol consumption, but it's all legal. I heard one s-word, but there's also name-calling in the beginning - Norma says goodbye to her son, whose friends call her "old". She says that she's only 35, and they say something like "You're a geezer to us!" As for sexual content, someone was called a "slut who marries for money", and at a party, Arthur chooses a present which turns out to be a photo. He and Norma don't want to show it to anyone, and some of the partygoes say "They must be private photos" or something like that. (I heard there was a sex scene that was removed in the theatrical cut so the film could receive a PG-13 rating, but I have no proof of that besides Wikipedia.)

Well, there you have it. If you can't sit through a 2 hour and 30 minute film, then don't see it. If you can, then it is probably for you, if you like convoluted adventures. I know I do.

Introducing a new feature: Box office weekends

I'd been planning this for my blog for awhile, but... each weekend, I have decided to report the box office totals for the weekend. Most of my info comes from boxofficemojo.com, but I'll add a bit of commentary. The way I start is I describe the top 5 films for the weekend: How much they made this weekend, how much they dropped from last weekend, their grand domestic totals so far, and other commentary if I feel like it. For example:

During the weekend of November 13-15, 2009, 2012 took the #1 spot at the box office with approximately $65,000,000. Currently, it is the seventh-highest opening of 2009, behind Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen ($109 million), X-Men Origins: Wolverine ($85 million), Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince ($78 million), Star Trek ($75 million), Fast & Furious ($71 million), and Up ($68 million). However, it won't last long, with The Twilight Saga: New Moon coming next weekend. However, it is also #7 in November debuts behind Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (2005, $103 million), Harry Potter and the Sorceror's Stone (2001, $90 million), Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (2002, $88 million), The Incredibles (2004, $70 million), Twilight (2008, $69.5 million), and Quantum of Solace (2008, $67.5 million).

Dropping 25.7% from last weekend is A Christmas Carol, coming it at approximately $22.3 million with approximately $63.3 million so far. It's still a tough bet if it's going to surpass its $200 million budget, but Christmas movies tend not to lose much of their audience during the holiday season. It won't lose its 3-D venues until December 18 when Avatar comes out, so it has a chance to surpass its budget by then.

Holding onto 3rd place from last weekend is The Men Who Stare at Goats, taking a 51.2% drop with a weekend gross of approximately $6.2 million, and a total of $23.4 million so far. Chances are by next weekend it will surpass its $25 million budget

Skyrocketing up to 4th place, still in limited release, is Precious: Based on the Novel "Push" by Sapphire. Expanding to 174 theaters this weekend, Precious took in approximately $6 million with a total of $8.9 million so far and a $35,000 per theater average. I have been unable to review Precious since it's not playing at my local theater, but there is a great chance it will arrive next weekend.

Rounding out the top 5 is Michael Jackson's This is It, dropping 61.2% with a total of $5.1 million this weekend, and approximately $68.2 million so farm, outgrossing Hannah Montana and Miley Cyrus: Best of Both Worlds Concert (2008)'s $65.3 million and becoming the top domestic concert film of all time.

If any films didn't open in the top 5, then I'll discuss them here. This also includes notable limited releases, such as ones that will expand later. For instance:

Also opening this weekend is Pirate Radio, opening with only $2.8 million at #11. While that may not seem like a huge haul, remember that Pirate Radio only opened at 882 sites, the second lowest of the top 12 behind Precious. Therefore, it pulled in $3,252 per theater, the fourth highest of the top 12 behind Precious ($35,000), 2012 ($19,095), and A Christmas Carol ($6,062). As well, it has already opened in the UK (under the name The Boat That Rocked, where it has grossed a total of $28.2 million USD, for a worldwide total of $31.1 million

Opening in limited release is Fantastic Mr. Fox at 4 sites, coming in at #22 with $260,000 total and $65,000 per theater.

Then I give the listings for the top 12, and describe what's no longer there:

1. 2012

2. A Christmas Carol

3. The Men Who Stare at Goats

4. Precious: Based on the Novel "Push" by Sapphire

5. Michael Jackson's This Is It

6. The Fourth Kind

7. Couples Retreat

8. Paranormal Activity

9. Law Abiding Citizen

10. The Box

11. Pirate Radio

12. Where the Wild Things Are

Out of the top 12 this weekend is Astro Boy (#13) and Saw VI (#19).

Then I close it off with a message.

I'll give another update next weekend when Precious: Based on the Novel "Push" by Sapphire expands wide as well as the openings of The Blind Side, Planet 51, and The Twilight Saga: New Moon.

Source: http://boxofficemojo.com/weekend/chart/?yr=2009&wknd=46&p=.htm

"Twilight" - no comment on it whatsoever

Please note that I am reviewing this from a DVD. I did not and probably will not be able to see it on the big screen.

Twilight (2008) is a romantic fantasy film based on the Stephanie Meyer novel of the same name. It is part of a series of novels known as "The Twilight Saga". Seventeen-year-old Isabella "Bella" Swan (Kristin Stewart) moves from Phoenix, Arizona to the town of Forks, Washington to be with her single dad Police Chief Charlie Swan (Billy Burke), as her mother Renee (Sarah Clarke) is remarrying and going on the road. There, Bella is introduced and welcomed by the students at the new school, and she learns about the mysterious Cullen family, namely Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson), who is 108 years old but looks 17. This is because he is really a vampire - he is stuck at the age that he transformed at. Edward is attracted to Bella by the scent of her blood, as well as her resistance to his ability to read minds. However, these vampires only drink animal blood. Despite Edward's warnings to stay away from him, Bella does not listen, causing her to be targeted by James the tracker vampire (Cam Gigadent) and the other two members of his "trio", Victoria (Rachelle Lefèvre) and Laurent (Edi Gathegi), who do drink human blood.

Of note is also Edward's family, all of whom are vampires: his father Carlisle Cullen (Peter Facinelli), his mother Esme Cullen (Elizabeth Reaser), his adopted sisters Alice Brandon Cullen (Ashley Greene) and Rosalie Hale (Nikki Reed) as well as the latter's husband Emmett Cullen (Kellan Lutz), and their newest addition, his adopted brother Jasper Hale (Jackson Rathbone). Taylor Lautner plays Jacob Black, Bella's childhood friend.

So... did anyone else understand that? I haven't read the books, so that may be part of the reason still sorta seems confusing to me, but I don't have many plans to read them. So... why did I watch this film, and why am I reviewing it? Well, I didn't know what Twilight was until late 2008 when this film was released. I never actually bothered to watch it, but I'd heard everyone talk about it, to the point where it was the new Harry Potter. However, I wasn't really interested in it because all I had heard about it was "it's about sparkling vampires", which sounded preposterous to me - however, it turns out that the Cullens sparkle when exposed to sunlight, and Edward did sparkle, but for no more than two minutes (to reveal his secret to Bella). However, I saw Adventureland in April of this year, which starred Kristin Stewart (turns out she actually did this film prior to the filming to Twilight), and got slightly interested in it. However, I was sort of afraid of it, partially due to vampire stories being associated with "emo" people (still not quite sure what that means) and hearing about a girl who nearly drowned a fifth grader to death because she insulted the books. However, after seeing the trailer for the next film in the series, The Twilight Saga: New Moon (coming November 20), I was somewhat interested in it. The final nail in the coffin was when I heard the original Twilight was coming back to the big screen November 19 at 9:00 PM for a discounted price ($5.00, three hours before the midnight premiere of The Twilight Saga: New Moon), and since I did review Toy Story and Toy Story 2 when they were re-released, I decided to review this too. Now, I was dreading it as I was watching it, but it wasn't as bad as I was expecting. It's nothing I'd pay big bucks for, and unfortunately I probably won't be able to catch the big screen showing of it (I have a class at that time, and it will probably sell out), but I was glad I saw it. Now I understand what all the hub-ub is all about... oh wait, no I don't! It sorta seemed like a pilot episode, waiting for the sequel... which I am now semi-excited about.

The film got a PG-13 rating, but I'm sure you already know of the kind of violence that can occur in a vampire-themed film. As well, a truck almost hits Bella, and Edward stops the truck with his bare hand. There is a large action scene on the end with chasing and James bites Bella, and you later see her in a hospital bed, but for spoiler purposes I won't explain any more. A vampire drinks a deer's blood in one scene. Several prom dresses show cleavage, and when two girls try on such dresses, one of them says something like "Does this make my boobs look good?". One of the minds Edward reads is about "sex". Renee asks Bella on the phone if she met a boy and if she's "safe" (you figure it out). There is a moderate amount of drinking, but no teen drinking. However, Edward says that Bella's blood is like "a brand of heroin".

This whole review was probably irrelevant to you, and you probably already know if you want to see it or not. However, I think the re-release is a good way to get new people into it - seeing it on the big screen may be enticing, and for a discounted ticket price it's a good deal. Of course, even if you already own the DVD, you may just want to relive seeing it on the big screen again for half price, so you could see it then. The film is two hours long, so that gives you an hour to prepare for the midnight showing of The Twilight Saga: New Moon, if it leaves you thirsty for more. My question is... why didn't Disney think of this with the Toy Story re-release? Why did they re-release it so early? They could have waited two weeks before Toy Story 3 comes out and re-released it then! Then there would have been more hype! (I heard some places have already sold out of this Twilight re-release in advance, but on the other hand, it's just one chance.)

(Pssst... Disney... pay attention and learn something from this! Re-release Cars in 3-D one or two weeks before Cars 2 comes out in 2011. It will make lots of money. )

"The Fourth Kind" - perhaps the most realistic horror movie ever, since it's based on true events... or is it?

The Fourth Kind is a horror film supposedly based on actual case studies. It takes place in Nome, Alaska, where me meet Dr. Abigail Tyler (Milla Jovovich, Resident Evil, Zoolander, A Perfect Getaway), a psychologist whose husband recently died. She and some of her clients, namely Scott Stracinsky (Enzo Cilenti) and Tommy (Corey Johnson, The Bourne Ultimatum, Saving Private Ryan, The Mummy, Hellboy) report some strange disturbances, some of which involve a strange-looking owl. Sometime later, her daughter, Ashley Tyler (Mia McKenna Bruce, EastEnders) has been seemingly kidnapped! Abigail believes that she saw her being abducted by strange beings, but will just anyone believe her story?

Also staring in this film is Elias Koteas (The Haunting in Connecticut, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles I and III, and the upcoming Shutter Island) as Dr. Abel Campos (alias, the real doctor didn't want his real name in this film), Abigail's shrink.

Okay, forget what I said about Paranormal Activity (I think I said something inaccurate about it, as a comment suggests), this is the most realistic horror film I've ever seen. Some of the original footage of Abigail Tyler is used, being played next to footage of Milla Jovovich. (At the beginning of the film, Milla says that it is real, and to believe what you want.) However, I don't think that was the best way to go about it, they should have just used the original footage and used Milla Jovovich to fill in the gaps. Words onscreen note when the audio is real. I thought the film was interesting, but I'm not sure if all of it was real. Parts of it actually made me cry - for instance, when Abigail Tyler reports her lost daughter, she loses custody of her son, which was pretty much the last thing she needed at that time. Any more discussion would result in spoilers.

The film scored a PG-13, and I feel it deserved it. As typical in a horror film, violence is most prominent: her husband was stabbed to death (we don't see the actual stabbing, but we see blood). In one of the audio samples (claimed to be real), we hear gunshots and a woman screaming and crying, later learning that the gunshots came from the woman's husband. There is a lot of twitching and screaming in hypnosis caused by Dr. Abel Campos, and while not everything is explained, it's implied she is witnessing something violent. As for sexuality... well, it is said that her husband was stabbed during sex (we don't even see any nudity though). There are a few s-words, said in anger, frustration, and utter grief. There is only one scene with wine.

If you like horror movies where monsters and demons pop out of every corner, this isn't for you. It's played like a documentary, so think about that before you go see it. And stay tuned during the closing credits for some other peoples' claims of supernatural sightings.

"The Men Who Stare at Goats" - though they don't actually stare at goats until about an hour into the film, and only for a few minutes

The Men Who Stare at Goats is a based on the 2004 novel of the same name by Jon Ronson. Bob Wilton (Ewan McGregor), Gus Lacey (Stephen Root), Lyn Cassady (George Clooney), and Bill Django (Jeff Bridges) are all army men during the 2003 war in Iraq, but they don't fight for the same reasons the other soldiers do - they practice psychic "Jedi" powers, and they seem to promote peace rather than fighting. Their idea of "fighting" is to capture Iraqi soldiers and force them to watch or listen to Barney & Friends music, and they test their psychic powers by staring at goats to try to weaken or kill them.

Hmmm, that seemed a little shorter than most of my synopses... well, that's about all there is to it. There really is no plot to this film. It just seems like a bunch of skits strung together for comedy purposes. That's not saying it's not funny, but I don't want to give away too many of the funny parts. There seems to be a subplot about Larry Hooper (Kevin Spacey) being jealous of Lyn's ability to "stare at goats", but again, that's all I can say without spoiling, and it's really not much anyway because the only "goat-staring" takes place about an hour into the film and only lasts a few minutes.

The film scored an R rating, mostly for drug use. There is a lot of LSD and many drug references in this film, and many of the soldiers believe that drugs and alcohol are useful in battle. There's also a bit of violence, as you'd expect in a film about soldiers, but it's mostly for comedy. There's the aforementioned "goat staring" scene, people try to walk through walls and hit them instead, and just war explosions. There are guns and knives, which are used for threatening purposes, but not always for attacking (except the "death touch" which takes years to work). The only sexual content is a hot-tub with women where we briefly see bare breasts and someone saying something about "having sex with Bart Simpson and Burt Reynolds".

If you just want to sit back and laugh at a film, or you believe in army men promoting peace instead of war, then by all means watch this film. If you want plot, then stay away.

"Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant"... more like "Characterization: The Sequel's Assistant"

Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant is a film adaptation of the first three books of "The Saga of Darren Shan" by Darren Shan, also known as the "Vampire Blood" trilogy, consisting of Cirque du Freak, The Vampire's Assistant, and Tunnels of Blood (all published in 2000). 16-year-old Darren Shan (Chris Massoglia, A Plumm Summer) is a very well-behaved boy who gets good grades and generally stays out of trouble, until he starts hanging out with Steve "Leopard" Leonard (Josh Hutcherson, Bridge to Teribithia, Journey to the Center of the Earth, The Polar Express). The two boys sneak off to the vampire show, Cirque du Freak. After seeing a bunch of freaks, they are introduced to the leader of the show, Larten Crepsley (John C. Reilly, Step Brothers, Talladega Nights: The Legend of Ricky Bobby, 9, Tim & Eric Awesome Show, Great Job!). Steve wants to become a vampire, but Crepsley refuses, and Darren steals the spider Madam Octa. Octa bites Steve, poisoning him. Crepsley will not provide an antidote unless Darren becomes his assistant. However, this requires Darren to become a vampire, meaning he can no longer walk into sunlight, and like all other vampires, must feed off human blood to survive. Darren reluctantly accepts, but during a fight with vampaneze (vampire enemies), and his refusal to drink blood, what will become of him? And what is going on between the vampires and the vampaneze? In a subplot, an unknown species Desmond Tiny (Michael Cerveris, Fringe) and his vampaneze henchman Murlaugh (Ray Stevenson, Punisher: War Zone, King Arthur) want Darren for themselves.

Other members of the Cirque du Freak show include Ken Watanabe (Letters from Iwo Jima, The Last Samurai, Memoirs of a Geisha, Batman Begins) as Hibernius Tall, the manager who can read people's minds, Patrick Fugit (Almost Famous) as Evra Von the Snake Boy, Frankie Faison (Tyler Perry's Meet the Browns, Hannibal Lecter films, etc.) as Rhamus Twobellies, whom, as the name implies, has two bellies and can eat most anything, Jane Krakowski (National Lampoon's Vacation, Ally McBeal, 30 Rock, The Flinstones in Viva Rock Vegas, Kit Kittredge: An American Girl, etc.) as Corma Limbs, who can regenerate broken limbs, Orlando Jones (MADtv, Office Space, and the former 7-Up spokesman) as Alexander Ribs, whose spine is extremely thin, Salma Hayek (Dogma, Wild Wild West, Spy Kids 3-D: Game Over, The Sinbad Show) as a woman who can grow a beard (and Crepsley's love interest), and Jessica Carlson as Rebecca, Darren's love interest (her freak ability may be a spoiler).

This is actually a very interesting franchise. I've never read the books, but I would like too. Before seeing the film, I had heard that it seemed like a 90-minute pilot episode just waiting for a sequel, though that's not exactly true. In its own way, it does leave room for a sequel, but it's like the characterization jumps around. You first see some characterization of Darren and Steve, then the plot thickens as they go to the vampire show, then the vampires and vampaneze are characterized as Steve and Darren develop more, then some more plot. I'll say if they make a sequel, I will definitely watch it, but judging by the film's box office gross (approximately $11.8 million in two weeks, with a $40 million budget) it's not likely that the next saga (the Vampire Rites saga, where Darren learns about the vampire clan and seeks acceptance) will be adapted, and even if it does, it may just be released direct-to-DVD, unless the film is a foreign success.

The film got a well-deserved PG-13 rating. As you'd expect from a film about vampires, the biggest thing would be violence, since vampires feed off other humans' blood to survive. Corma also breaks off her fingers and she and Alexander Ribs eat it from each side until they kiss (possibly an allusion to the spaghetti scene in Lady and the Tramp). But don't forget - Corma can regenerate broken limbs, so she's okay. Darren's teacher scratches the chalkboard with his nails, then later vampire Darren does, destroying the chalkboard. Before Madame Octa bites Steve, he tries to squash her. There is a lot of vampire fighting, but it's too cool to spoil. Rebecca offers Darren her blood, and he reluctantly accepts (we don't see all of him drinking her blood). As for sexual content, Madame Truska shows a lot of cleavage, as does someone in the audience (who has a butterfly tattoo on her cleavage). As usual in a PG-13 film, there is a lot of social drinking, but the reason Steve is so misbehaved is because his mom is always drunk and he hasn't seen his dad in ages, so he hates his life.

I would recommend this film to any fan of John C. Reilly, or of the books, or of vampire stories in general. I can already say this is no Twilight (though I've never actually seen or read Twilight, and I'm not sure if I want to). However, if you'd rather all the characterization at the beginning, or something that doesn't seem like build-up for a sequel, or you're just plain sick of vampire stories, then just skip it. Don't worry so much about the freaks if it sounds gross, they don't get that much screentime.

"Astro Boy" - doesn't break any new ground, but that's not necessarily a bad thing... heck in some cases it's for the better

Astro Boy is an American film adaptation of Osama Tezuka's Japanese manga/anime franchise of the same name. Toby Tenma (Freddie Highmore, The Spiderwick Chronicles, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, The Golden Compass) lives in the floating town of Metro City with his father Dr. Tenma (Nicolas Cage, Knowing, G-Force, Bangkok Dangerous, National Treasure: Book of Secrets) who works for the Ministry of Science, alongside Dr. Elefun (Bill Nighy, Hot Fuzz, G-Force, Pirates of the Caribbean, Underworld: Rise of the Lycans, and the upcoming Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows). Toby is accidentally killed during the testing of an invention, but is re-created as a robot. However, Tenma is displeased as he feels this creation cannot replace his son. Toby runs away from home and winds up on the surface world, where he is greeted by the Robot Revolutionary Front, consisting of Sparx (Matt Lucas, Little Britain), Robotski (Bill Nighy), and Mike the Fridge (David Bowers, Flushed Away, as well as the director of both films) who dub him, "Astro Boy". He is later found by some humans, including Cora (Kristen Bell, Couples Retreat, Fanboys, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Veronica Mars, Gossip Girl, and the upcoming When in Rome), Zane (Moisés Arias, Hannah Montana, Nacho Libre, Beethoven's Big Break, Dadnapped), and Grace (Madeline Caroll, Swing Vote, and the upcoming The Spy Next Door), who take him to their friend Hamegg (Nathan Lane, The Producers, The Lion King, Swing Vote) who used to work for the Ministry of Science. "Astro Boy" thinks he belongs here, but what happens when he finds out that Hamegg runs a robot gladiator-style arena? And in a subplot, President Stone (Donald Sutherland, Dirty Sexy Money, Pride & Prejudice) is unleashing his robotic creation, "The Peacekeeper" (which accidentally killed Toby), but what is really going on?

Samuel L. Jackson (Snakes on a Plane, Pulp Fiction, Lakeview Terrace, Soul Men, the Star Wars prequels, the upcoming Iron Man 2, etc.) also stars as Zog, a robot Astro brings back to life, and Eugene Levy (American Pie, Taking Woodstock, etc.) stars as Orrin, the Tenma residence's cleaner robot.

Astro Boy has quite a history in Japan and in the USA, appearing in a Japanese manga that was adapted into a television series in the 1960s, then later in the 1980s, and most recently in 2003 (was seen in the USA on the now-defunct Kids' WB! network). For the most part, the film stayed true to all of the Astro Boy media, except for making Astro embarrassed about being a robot (in other Astro Boy media, robots and humans live peacefully side-by-side, though that may just be in Metro City and not the rest of the world) and making Astro fight robots in Hamegg's tournament (in other media, he'd never do that unless it was self-defense or to protect someone, unless it was for slapstick comedy purposes). But hey, I don't write reviews to nag about faithfulness, I write reviews to rate films as standalone. Now I don't really remember the old Astro Boy series that well, but I remember the '03 one quite well. And honestly, this film doesn't seem to break much new ground, as the ending seems to show (I still won't spoil it though). Nonetheless, it is quite enjoyable.

The film scored a PG rating. There's really not much besides violence, though there is a scene on a beach with a girl in a bikini, and Astro's rocket boots tan her. I won't describe all the violence, especially since part of it is a spoiler, but here are the main highlights: The Peacekeeper kills Toby, but we don't see it on screen. Astro flies around Metro City and causes a lot of destruction, and even more when Tenma and Stone try to catch him, shooting at him, and he falls to the surface. The orphans chase each other with chainsaws, Hamegg zaps Astro (to reveal that he's a robot), and Astro competes in Hamegg's robot-fighting gladiator tournament... until Zog and Astro are pitted against each other. They refuse to fight, and after getting zapped by Hamegg, Zog almost steps on him... but Astro holds back his foot. Last, but not least, there's Astro's battle with The Peacekeeper, which I won't tell you how it ends, but again, I'll bring up some highlights: The Peacekeeper absorbs anything he touches, becoming even bigger, and causing Metro City to fall to the ground. Astro Boy learns he has rocket cannons in his arms and butt and uses them against him. The Peacekeeper is about to stop on him, but Cora saves him at the last minute. Afterwards, Astro appears dead, but... I'm going to stop there. I'll contact privately what happened to him. The very final scene in the film has what seems to be an eyeball with tentacles coming out of it, which Astro flies up toward and is about to punch, but before he makes contact, the film ends.

Well, if you're a fan of any incarnation of Astro Boy, then you probably will like this film. If you just want a film about robots fighting each other, or a father/son film or a film about the equality of robots and humans, you may also like it regardless of past familiarity with Astro Boy.

"Michael Jackson's This Is It" - This is it for Michael Jackson

Michael Jackson's This Is It is a compilation of Michael Jackson's rehearsals for and the making of his planned concert series known as "This Is It". Back in March 2009, Michael Jackson scheduled this series of concerts to return to the stage after a 12-year absence. After much rehearsal and an announced date, his 50-date concert tour was completely sold out. Unfortunately, a tragic event happened on June 25 - The King of Pop died due to cardiac arrest. All of his concerts were canceled, but Kenny Ortega (director and/or choreographer of the High School Musical trilogy, Dirty Dancing, the Hannah Montana and Miley Cyrus: Best of Both Worlds Concert Tour, and Michael Jackson's other concerts) had filmed all of Michael Jackson's rehearsals. All the footage was collected to form this film. Featured songs include "Wanna Be Startin' Somethin'", "Speechless", "Jam", "They Don't Care About Us", "Bad", "Human Nature", "Smooth Criminal", "The Way You Make Me Feel", "I Want You Back", "The Love You Save", "I'll Be There", "Shake Your Body (Down to the Ground)", "I Just Can't Stop Loving You", "Thriller", "Beat It", "Black or White", "Earth Song", "Billie Jean", "Man in the Mirror", "Heal the World", and of course, his most recent, and last, "This Is It" (all in order sans the last two).

I'm sure many people are going to remember Michael Jackson's death for many years the way they remember the 9/11 tragedy. Can you recall what you were doing when you heard that Michael Jackson died on June 25 of this year? I remember I was looking around Borders with my friend, after we'd just seen Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. He had received a call on his cell phone that Michael Jackson had died. My mother was affected the most by it. According to my research, upon his death, the This is It concert tickets had a choice of either being refunded, or kept as a memento of The King of Pop (he designed the tickets himself). Those of you who did happen to purchase a ticket and got a refund can spend considerably less money on seeing the making of what would have been. However, let's face it - we all saw the reaction to his death, and how quickly we forgot about the other star (Farrah Fawcett) who died that day too. This film is pretty much an excuse to cash in on his death, which may be a little disturbing to some, but nonetheless otherwise enjoyable.

The film scored a PG rating. In many scenes, some dancers wore skimpy outfits (and not just women, bare-chested men wore tight shorts too) and one dance involved the dancer grabbing his or her crotch. No mention is made of his inappropriate behavior with children, but during rehearsal, when someone plays a piano, Jackson says "The song doesn't have enough booty". Some of the lyrics to "Smooth Criminal" were "He came into the apartment, he left the bloodstains on the carpet" and "So she ran into the bedroom - she was struck down, it was her doom" and "You've been hit by, you've been struck by a smooth criminal" and the music video for it shows a man chasing a man with a gun, and as he shoots at him, we see the bullets in slow-motion as the other man jumps through a glass window, shattering it. The "Thriller" rehearsal involves dancers dressed like zombies who wear things that look like blood and rotting flesh.

Well, if you think you owe it to The King of Pop to see his rehearsal of what was meant to be, then by all means, see this film. If you don't like the idea of a company profiting off of his death, then don't. Just remember - this is a two-week event, and as of this writing, you only have ten days left to see it. Now one could argue that this could very well top the Hannah Montana and Miley Cyrus: Best of Both Worlds Concert from 2008 that was scheduled to be a "one-week event" which created so much rush that it lasted longer (and was just repeated with the Toy Story/Toy Story 2 double feature), but that's Disney we're talking about. Sony/Columbia said they weren't going to be so lenient even when This is It was making record sales in advance. So if you want to see it, you better get a move on before it's gone!

"Paranormal Activity" - high on the Paranormal, low on the Activity

Paranormal Activity is a horror film entirely comprised of real footage. Micah Sloat and Katie Featherston (as themselves) suspect that Katie is being haunted by demons, as well as other paranormal activities. This is a compilation of footage to try to capture any paranormal activity on tape.

You heard it, folks - this is not a scripted film. (Even if it was, the script would be nearly empty - not much is said.) It is not your average horror movie - no special effects, no demons popping up or monsters falling out of the sky that leave blood stains everywhere, it's all real... I think. (The budget was $15,000. That should tell you something.) The only real "scary" stuff is doors opening for some reason and other things like that. I said it was "high on the Paranormal and low on the Activity" because the film is basically 90 minutes of build-up leading to one final scene at the end which I won't spoil, because if I do tell you, it will pretty much ruin any reason to see the film. I was actually scared by the end, because for 90 minutes I was waiting for something scary to happen... but I'll be quiet before I ruin it for anyone.

The film received an R rating... the MPAA description was "Language" and nothing else, and yeah, that's just what it is. There's about 40 f-words, and many religious exclaims ("God", "Jesus", etc.) The only violent scene can't be described without spoiling, though some may find the door opening on its own a bit scary, as well as an Ouija board somehow being set on fire. There is a drinking scene, and Micah telling Katie to "pop a pill" because he thinks she's just crazy. Throughout the film, Katie is seen wearing cleavage-bearing tops, and in one scene where Micah is holding the camera, he asks her for a striptease. She says no. He then asks her to just strip down to her bra and panties, and again she says no. Much of the film takes place while the couple are in bed, and there is implied sex, but no nudity.

If you want a film were stuff keeps happening throughout, or a horror film where the characters are constantly bombarded by demons and monsters, this isn't for you. If you can sit through 90 minutes of no-show leading up to something big, then this is your film. Of course, you could always rent it and fast-forward to the end, but that might just ruin the suspense. (I saw the midnight showing, and there was a lot of the audience talking during silent scenes.)

"The Stepfather" - not who he appears to be, but isn't it obvious?

The Stepfather is a remake of the 1987 horror film of the same name. Susan Harding (Sela Ward, Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights, House) is a divorced mother of three: Michael Harding (Penn Badgley, Gossip Girl), his younger brother Sean Harding (Braeden Lemasters, Ghost Whisperer), and their younger sister Beth Harding (Skyler Samuels). She has just met a man who supposedly goes by the name of David Harris (Dylan Walsh, Nip/Tuck) whom she is planning to marry. However, Michael, as well as his blood-father Jay Harding (Jon Tenney, The Closer) are very suspicious of "David", believing him to be Grady Edwards, a serial killer that they've seen on America's Most Wanted. In a subplot, Michael's girlfriend Kelly (Amber Heard) is trying to help Michael get into college, but he keeps putting it off for the investigation, which she does not believe in.

Other stars in the film include Nancy Linehan Charles as Mrs. Cutter, the elderly neighbor, Paige Turco (Guiding Light, All My Children, Big Shots, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II and III) as Jackie Kerns, Susan's sister, and her lesbian lover Leah (Sherry Stringfield, ER, Shark).

Let's face it - the only reason I saw this film was to laugh at it. I've never seen the original version, but the trailer simply made this film look like a joke - and that's what it was. It's really obvious who David Harris is, given the ominous music that plays around him every time he appears on screen. There really isn't much more to it than that.

The film got a well-deserved PG-13 rating. When Sean is playing his video game with the volume up high, his mother tells him to turn it down. "David" grabs him by the neck and says, "She said turn it down!" in a menacing voice. "David" pushes Mrs. Cutter down the stairs and closes her nose and mouth to suffocate her to death. I won't describe the end sequence in too much detail, but I'll bring up these highlights: During a chase, "David" crashes through a bathroom door where Susan is hiding, shattering the mirror, then Susan grabs a shard of glass and stabs "David" (there is some blood on him, and some coming out of Susan's hand, but not too much). Michael kicks "David" down the steps to the attic, Kelly attempts to use a buzz-saw on "David" but falls through the fragile floorboards (no one is hurt by the buzz-saw, but they are both knocked out). "David" punches Kelly in the face, and there is a bit of blood on her face. I will only describe the very last violent scene in private. Many scenes with the dinner table have some alcoholic beverages at them, and "David" shares a tequila with Michael (nothing intoxicating happens). There is also talk about drunk victims who were killed. I could only count one f-word and one s-word. Last of all, for sexual content... Kelly wears a bikini in nearly every scene except the end sequence (except two scenes where she wears a tanktop). She also tells Michael that she is "screwing" someone else (to get his attention).

I won't spoil the film for the three people who can't figure it out, but if you just want to sit back and laugh at a film, this is your film. Just don't expect anything good from it.

"Where the Wild Things Are" - in all of us no matter the age

Where the Wild Things Are is the film adaptation of the 1963 children's book of the same name by Maurice Sendak. Max (Max Records, The Brothers Bloom) is not happy with his family, and he enjoys playing make-believe. When he gets into a fight with his mother Connie (Catherine Keener, Being John Malkovich, The 40-Year-Old Virgin, The Soloist), he runs away from home and finds himself among the Wild Things: Carol (voice of James Gandolfini, The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3), Ira (voice of Forest Whitaker, The Shield, Ghost Dog: The Way of the Samurai), Judith (Catherine O'Hara, Away We Go, Chicken Little, The Nightmare Before Christmas, Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events), Alexander (Paul Dano, Taking Woodstock, Little Miss Sunshine, The Girl Next Door), Douglas (Chris Cooper, October Sky, American Beauty, Seabiscuit), and The Bull (Michael Berry, Jr., Star Trek, Mission Impossible III, Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl). The Wild Things have gotten into a fight among each other, as they are upset over the departure of K.W. (Lauren Ambrose, Six Feet Under), but Max convinces them that he is their "King". He tries to have fun with them, but it only leads to more misery, especially when K.W. returns.

So how do you turn a 10-sentence children's book into a 9o-minute movie? Like this. Each of the Wild Things represents a different personality - Carol is the most outspoken, Douglas wants attention, and so on, and so forth. I thought this was a very enjoyable film with a good message, and I feel anyone can enjoy and relate to it. The message is about how difficult (and maybe impossible) it is to make everyone happy. Despite the book being short, the film didn't take that many liberties with it - it's still basically the same story, just greatly expanded on.

The film received a PG rating, mainly for violence - of course, there's no blood, but in the beginning, Max bites his mom (we don't see it that well though). He also tries to play a game where he divides the Wild Things into "good guys" and "bad guys" and gets them to throw dirt clods (and a raccoon) at each other. K.W. steps on Carol's face, Carol goes on a huge tantrum and starts smashing things, and K.W. hides Max in her mouth (we see him on the inside of her stomach). Carol also tears off Douglas' arm (sand or dirt comes out of it, and he later replaces it with a stick). There isn't much sexual content, though Ira does... something (can't really tell) to Judith in one scene (she tells him to stop and he does). That's about it.

Well, if you like the book, or enjoyed reading it when you were little, the movie is definitely for you.

"The Invention of Lying" - a different kind of "What If?" movie

The Invention of Lying is a fantasy comedy film. It is set in a world where no one can lie or even withhold anything true; there is no fiction. All the signs say things like "Restaurant: Where People Go To Eat" and all "films" are merely documentaries. The story centers around Mark Bellison (Ricky Gervais, The Office (UK), Extras, Night at the Museum, Stardust) who is a screenwriter for the company "Lecture Films". He is assigned to do a film about the 13th century, but not much happened back then besides the Black Plague, which few people are interested in. As a result, he is fired. On top of it all, his blind date Anna McDoogles (Jennifer Garner, Juno, 13 Going on 30, Ghosts of Girlfriends Past, Catch Me If You Can, and Dude, Where's My Car?) bluntly tells him that he is out of her league because of his looks and financial situation. The rent collector tells him he has one day to pay his $800 rent bill or he will be evicted. He goes to the bank to withdraw the $300 he has left to move his stuff out of his house, but the systems are down. Just then, something in his mind tells him to lie and say that he has $800 in his account. The bank teller buys this, even when the systems go back online, and gives him $800. Since no one has ever lied before, everyone seems to believe everything he says, so he uses this not only to try to win Anna back, but also to help people, such as trying to convince his neighbor Frank (Jonah Hill, Superbad, Funny People, Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian) not to commit suicide, as well as calming down his terminally ill mother Martha (Fionnula Flanagan, Yes Man, Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood, Star Trek: The Next Generation), but this is the first time anyone's mentioned an afterlife. When the doctors overhear this, word gets out about this, and Mark is forced to make up a story about "the man in the sky" and the afterlife.

Also starring in this film are Tina Fey (Baby Mama, Saturday Night Live, 30 Rock, Mean Girls, Ponyo) as Mark's assistant Shelley, Jeffrey Tambor (Arrested Development, Hellboy II: The Golden Army, The Hangover, Monsters vs. Aliens) as Mark's boss Anthony James, Rob Lowe (The West Wing, Brothers & Sisters, The Outsiders) as Mark's rival at work, Brad Kessler, and Louis C.K. (Late Show with David Letterman, Late Night with Conan O'Brien, The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, Jimmy Kennel Live) as Mark's best friend Greg.

Unfortunately, I got to the theater a few minutes late, so I missed the first part of it (when I arrived, Mark was on the date with Anna). However, what I saw of the film was pretty funny. In the title, I called it "a different kind of 'What If?'" because it is the answer to the question "What if lying, the afterlife, and fiction were all invented in modern times?" It opened my mind to how people viewed the world in ancient times, and made me wonder how the first lie or piece of fiction came into play, and if people bought it or not. The film's message seemed to be "make your own choices instead of believing others" and I think it delivered the message quite well - it didn't beat it into the viewer's heads, not even at the end. My favorite thing about the film was just how deep Mark was going with his lies - it seemed as though he was just digging himself deeper with each one, especially the part about the afterlife. Even the old cliché "Look over there!" gag seemed like it was fresh and new in this film. Another thing I liked was the fact that when he found out anyone believed anything he said, he used it more to help people than for power or money (well, he did cheat in a bet at a casino, but it was because his friends suggested it, and he later used the money to help a homeless man).

The film scored a PG-13 rating, mainly due to drinking and sexual content. A lot of social drinking occurs throughout the film, usually at bars or restaurants, though in one scene Greg drives while intoxicated, and is then pulled over by a cop (Edward Norton, Fight Club, The Incredible Hulk) (who wants a $5400 bribe to fuel his cocaine addiction). Greg blows into a breathalyzer, and the cop says it's "off the charts". As for sexual content, when Mark finds out that anyone believes anything he says, he asks Greg and the bartender (Phillip Seymour Hoffman, Doubt, The Big Lebowski, Mission: Impossible III) what they would want more than anything else, and they say "to touch a girl's boobs" and maybe to have sex. This prompts Mark to go out on the street, where he meets a woman (Stephanie March, Law & Order: Special Victims Unit, Head of State) who says that she is not attracted to him, but he tells her that the world will end if she does not have sex with him soon (she buys it and we later see them in a motel, she takes her belt off and asks Mark to undo her dress, and though she panics, they don't actually have sex). Mark also forbids Anna from having sex with Brad because he wants her to avoid pre-marital sex, but this makes her birthday present to Mark - a "sex coupon" - useless. Anna considers dating Brad so their kids will look better, so Mark calls Brad a "sperm donor". A waitress at the bar says she wanted to be a stripper, but she's not attractive enough. There is minimal violence in the film, such as a hit during the aforementioned pullover scene (played for laughs) as well as Martha's death, and Anna mentions her father died of a heart attack. Someone else in a crowd mentions her mother had cancer, and someone else mentions his boat was capsized on a boating trip (Mark says "the man in the sky" is responsible for all this). There's also a scene where two bullies push another kid's ice cream onto his shirt. There is some mild profanity as well.

While it may not be the best film of the year, personally I thought it is by far the best film of the year to go see if you are going to the theater looking for a 90-minute escape from reality (my previous choice was Shorts) as the thought of imagining everyone listening to you might be enticing. If you're a fan of fantasy comedy or anyone in the cast, I say it is definitely the film for you, but as per the film's message, don't see it just because I told you to - make the decision yourself.

"Whip It" - not to be confused with DEVO

Whip It is a drama/comedy film based on the Shauna Cross novel Derby Girl. Bliss Cavendar (Ellen Page, X-Men: The Last Stand, Juno) is being forced to enter beauty pageants just because her parents Brooke (Marcia Gay Harden, Flubber, Meet Joe Black, Mona Lisa Smile) and Earl (Daniel Stern, Home Alone, Dilbert) want her to. She works at a local diner with her best friends Pash (Alia Shawkat, Rebound, Arrested Development) and "Birdman" (Carlo Alban, Sesame Street). But one day, she decides to sneak out and without her parents knowing, she lies about her age so she can play roller derby. She goes by the name "Babe Ruthless" and joins the "Hurl Scouts" team, including "Maggie Mayhem" (Kristen Wiig, Saturday Night Live, Knocked Up, Extract, Adventureland, Forgetting Sarah Marshall), "Smashley Simpson" (Drew Barrymore, E.T.: The Extra-Terrestrial, He's Just Not That Into You, Never Been Kissed, Donnie Darko, Scream, etc.) "Rosa Sparks" (Eve, Glee, xXx), and "Bloody Holly"(Zoë Bell, Inglourious Basterds, Gamer, Kill Bill, Xena: Warrior Princess). Their main rival is the "Holy Rollers" team, namely Iron Maven (Juliette Lewis, Starsky and Hutch, Cape Fear) and Eva Destruction (Ari Graynor, The Sopranos, Nick and Nora's Infinite Playlist, Fringe, and the upcoming Youth in Revolt). But what happens when Pash is nearly arrested and Bliss doesn't stick up for her, her parents find out about this, and her team finds out that she is only 17?

I was blown away by this film. Forget what I said about I Can Do Bad All By Myself, Whip It is my new favorite film of 2009, and possibly one of the best films I've ever seen. It has a strong female character who is the opposite of a female stereotype - I mean, she declines the opportunity to join a beauty pageant to play a sport. They immediately accept her, and she has a lot of fun with them. Many films with female leads nowadays just have a female lead as a huge fashion-obsessed stereotype (Confessions of a Shopaholic, anyone?) or who is simply there to wear skimpy clothes and be what we call the "fanservice" girl (like Megan Fox in Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen and Jennifer's Body) or both (practically the whole cast of Sex and the City) or, while not so bad, just for a love interest (The Proposal, My Life in Ruins, The Ugly Truth, etc.) But there comes a rare gem where the female lead is strong and either independent, the decision-making type, or enjoying her surroundings that don't involve fashion, dating, and sex. This year, we had some examples, such as My Sister's Keeper, Post Grad, Julie & Julia, and even Monsters vs. Aliens. In Whip It, the female lead is strong, both physically and mentally. She does have a love interest in Oliver (Landon Pigg, this being his film debut), but he doesn't take up that much screen time. She does wear skimpy clothes at times, but do you really think she is going to be fully clothed during a sport like this? The ending is not what I expected at all.

The film scored a well-deserved PG-13 rating. Drug use consists of some underage drinking (Bliss lied about her age, she is 17 but said she was 22) and Pash nearly gets arrested for holding a beer when the police are around. A lot of people of varying ages drink while watching matches. As for sexuality - as mentioned before, people wear skimpy clothes, but it's not for erotic effect. However, the announcer Johnny (Jimmy Fallon, Saturday Night Live/Weekend Update) makes many sexual jokes, including "a sequel in his pants" (which is "Spider-Man Three and a half inches wide"), and a sign that says "Call Me: STD Free". Bliss and Oliver do strip at the bottom of the pool, but there is no full nudity and we don't see the actual stripping. Since the film is about roller derby, you can bet your bottom dollar there is violence, and Smashley Simpson gets a bloody face in one scene. There are a few s-words as well.

Another excellent film that deserves my recommendation, especially if you're looking for a good film with a strong female role.